Today's Run, and my Fragile Psyche

After two days of "post-disaster" rest, I was ready to get back out there today.

6.2 miles, 52:10 (8:25 avg/mile) 131 avg HR, 160 peak HR

Before I get into the run, I'll share something that made my jaw drop this morning. I only weigh myself once a week (it'll soon be more often). Today the scale showed me nearly three pounds lighter than last week! I don't know how much of that was due to dehydration from Monday, but I'm quite a bit lighter than I'd like to be now (nearing Ryan Hall territory…sans the speed). I still feel a little weak today but, again, that could be due to the Monday debacle, or the recent high mileage.

Because of my plummeting weight, I ate a large breakfast this morning (why not overcompensate immediately, right?). This delayed today's run, as I felt a little queasy and weak. Still, I made my way out and ran the first four miles at exactly 9:00 pace. This is my easy "recovery" pace, but it didn't feel good. I felt pretty sluggish and was breathing too hard. I then decided that, when I hit the start of mile 5, I was going to bump it up a notch, just to blow out the pipes a little. I kicked it into a gear that felt like about a 7:00-7:10 pace. When I looked at my Garmin at the end of the mile, it read 6:43! Okay, good. I can't say it felt easy, but I was very much in control and could have pushed even more. I backed off the last mile (7:46) and felt pretty good when I finished.

I didn't need to bust out a quick mile for training purposes. That 6:43 was quite a bit faster than my planned marathon race pace, but my psyche needed it badly. I needed reassurance that my wheels could still turn when I wanted them to. I hate to admit it, but Monday's blow-up really shook my confidence. I know it shouldn't have, but my fickle brain has me questioning a lot of things about my training. My wife reassures me that I'll be strong and ready come marathon morning, and I know she's right. But while I felt very confident about this marathon over a week ago, I'm now filled with a combination of confidence, respect and a dash of fear. Still, I'm very much looking forward to it.